


I'm Hooked On A Feeling

by starlight_starbright



Series: Tumblr Prompt Fills [3]
Category: Captain America (Movies) RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Chris Is A Sweetheart, Chris' PCA, D/s undertones, Dirty Talk, Evanstan - Freeform, Explicit Sexual Content, First Kiss, First Time, M/M, Marking, Morning Sex, Riding, Sebastian Makes Breakfast, Self-Doubt, Showers, bottom!Sebastian, top!Chris
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-14
Updated: 2015-01-14
Packaged: 2018-03-07 12:06:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3173310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlight_starbright/pseuds/starlight_starbright
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The week before he left for Europe, he and Chris had been watching movies and taking shots and Chris had kissed him. It wasn't a big kiss or even a long one, just a small kiss that had ripped Sebastian's world apart.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I'm Hooked On A Feeling

**Author's Note:**

> . . . I'm high on believin' that you're in love with me.
> 
> Title from Blue Swede

It's awful, not being there for Chris' PCA. But Sebastian can't help it. He was on a plane and Chris was in the States and it's not like Chris missed him. He and Chris are friends and yeah it would have been nice if Sebastian could've been there, but he had called Chris in the airport and left a happy voicemail congratulating him on the win. Chris wouldn't see it for a while—he has after parties and other friends he's going to be busy with for a while—but Sebastian's glad he did it. 

He's laying in bed in his apartment in New York now two days later contemplating his feelings for Chris. The moment he saw the man, he knew he was done for. Blue eyes, Steve Rogers-blonde hair, and the way that he can make anyone laugh . . . Sebastian fell in love instantly and hasn't come up for air since. 

The week before he left for Europe, he and Chris had been watching movies and taking shots and Chris had kissed him. It wasn't a big kiss or even a long one, just a small kiss that had ripped Sebastian's world apart. And then Chris hadn't talked about it. They hadn't discussed it and Sebastian had figured it was a mistake or it was the alcohol they had been drinking or anything other than assuming Chris had any real kind of feelings for him.  

He scrolls through his Instagram feed. It's what he does when he's bored or down . . . reading the comments from all the fans just boosts his mood even if it is the crazy hours of the night and he should be sleeping. He's reading a long fan comment when his phone goes black and then shows Chris' face. Chris is calling him. His heartbeat speeds up and he scrambles to answer, punching the touch screen with angry fingers. 

" _Alo_?"

"Seb!" There’s loud music in the background, but it's getting quieter as the seconds tick past. Chris is leaving somewhere. 

"Congrats on the win, Chris." Chris laughs and Sebastian melts. 

"I got your voicemail. It's not a big deal, really. But the trophy did look a little . . ." Sebastian laughs. 

"Yeah, I know what you mean." Chris pauses and Sebastian hears a car door shut. 

"So I'm in New York for a bit and kind of on my way to your apartment?" Chris says, voice going up at the end like its a question. Sebastian makes a surprised sound. "I know you just got back but I haven't seen you in forever. I thought it might be nice to hang out. I mean, you can say no. Fuck—I know it's late. I don't really . . . I mean it wouldn't offend me." Sebastian glances around his apartment.  

"No! No, you can come. Shut the fuck up and get your ass over here." Chris laughs, long and loud, and Sebastian smiles. Chris' laugh is contagious and beautiful. 

 "Well someone's bossy," Chris teases. Sebastian blushes. "I'll see you in like ten minutes, okay?" 

"Did you eat?" Sebastian asks.  

"Seb it's like one AM."

"Oh . . . uh yeah. Coffee?" Chris laughs. 

"Coffee's great," Chris says. "I'm pulling up now, kay?" Chris sounds nervous, but Sebastian can't tell why.  

"Okay. Just come in." Chris hangs up and Sebastian pours coffee, humming quietly to himself. Of course Chris still knocks, and Sebastian pads over to the door to let him in. As soon as the slab of wood is out of the way, Chris pulls him into the tightest hug of Sebastian's life. There are lips on his forehead and then Chris is shutting the door and reeling Sebastian back into the hug—clinging like Sebastian is everything he's ever wanted. 

"I missed you," Chris whispers. "I wanted to . . . I have to . . ." And then Chris kisses him. Actually kisses him. Sebastian's head is swimming and he can't think to do anything other than wrap his arms around Chris' neck and kiss back. Chris turns them around to press Sebastian up against the door, cool wood making friends with Sebastian's back. Chris' lips are warm and plush under Sebastian's, his beard scraping roughly over smooth skin. 

"Chris . . ." Sebastian murmurs, pulling back, then thinking better of it and stealing another kiss.  

"God, Sebastian . . . Fuck—" Chris is panicking. "I came to your apartment and totally jumped you. I'm sorry, Seb, I—" Sebastian kisses him soundly, erasing all doubt from Chris' mind. The closer he presses to Chris, the more he can feel how excited Chris really is.  

"Shh," Sebastian whispers. "This okay?" He looks up with his best innocent face and Chris' eyes widen. 

"Fuck yes. God. Sebastian—" But they don't move because Chris kisses him again and Sebastian is quite content where he is, coffee forgotten but happy to wait.  

"Chris, I think the door feels molested," Sebastian whispers. Chris pulls back to stare at him for a few moments and the throws his head back and laughs. It's beautiful, the way Chris laughs—exposing the column of his throat. Sebastian leans in and nips at it, eliciting a groan from the bigger man. 

"You made coffee?" Chris asks. Sebastian nods and goes to grab a mug, pressing the warm ceramic into Chris' hands. Chris takes the mug in one hand and takes Sebastian's hand in the other, leading him toward the couch. They sit with about six inches of space between them, but to Sebastian, it feels like miles. Chris has a strange look on his face as he sips the coffee. "Did you want any?" he asks. 

"I made it for you." And it's true—Sebastian likes to buy his coffee, mostly Starbucks, rather than make it. Chris smiles and strokes his thumb over the top of Sebastian's hand. 

"I want this. With you." Sebastian looks up sharply at Chris. Chris wants what? The kissing? Sex? Or maybe a relationship? Because yes. Sebastian wants all of those things. And Chris' words along with the tightness of his pants when they were kissing agree that maybe they both want this. "I mean—fuck. I don't know how to do this, Seb. I don't keep girlfriends for more than four months and I've never dated a guy but you're so fuckin' beautiful and you're kind to everyone and you're just fuckin' perfect. I wanna go to sleep every night with you in my arms and wake up with you every morning and--fuck, I mean only if you want that. I don't wanna pressure you into anything. I'm not saying any of this right . . . You can stop me any time now." Sebastian smiles shyly. He's never had anyone call him perfect.  

So he simply says, "yes," and leans in to snuggle into Chris' side. "I want that," he clarifies. "With you." Chris throws an arm around his shoulders and kisses his hair. 

"Good. I don't know what I would have done if you'd said no." Sebastian laughs. The idea is almost offensive to him. If anything, it would have been Chris saying no to him. There are so many things Chris does't know about him—so many things he's terrified for Chris to know. So many things he wants Chris to know but is afraid will scare him off. "I know what you're thinking," Chris says. "Nothing you tell me will change the way I feel about you." Sebastian tenses. How the fuck does Chris do that? It's like he really can read Sebastian's mind. 

"Chris . . ." Sebastian doesn't know what to say. "The way I got started . . . the roles I took—"

"I don't care," Chris says, pulling Sebastian's face up—forcing him to look up. Chris' face is serious like he could possibly mean the words. "I don't care what you did to get where you are now. All I care about is being here. With you." Chris kisses him softly. "It's not like I don't have my own issues." Sebastian sighs. He knows about the anxiety. Chris has called him a few times when it's gotten bad. He's had to go find Chris at premiers or cons when he disappears to calm himself down. He's brought water and hugs and comfort. There's not going to be any fighting Chris on this one. 

"Alright. Just . . . _vă rog_ , I'm not good with relationships. Not that I'm unfaithful . . . I just don't always know what to do or say." Chris smiles and kisses him again. 

"So we're on the same page there." Sebastian's heart lifts a bit and he lets out a startled laugh. Neither of them know how to do this. They're in it together, to learn together. 

"This could be a disaster," Sebastian says, trying one last time. 

"Then we'll go through it together," Chris says decisively. "I've wanted this—you—for a long time, I'm not going to give it up because we're scared." Sebastian falls in love all over again at those words, at the way Chris' mouth moulds to his. 

They make out on the couch like teenagers for a long time, not rushing anything. But eventually they end up horizontal with Sebastian on top of all that hard muscle, rolling his hips languidly. There's no hurry—they have time. The couch creeks happily when things get heated, and again when they slow down. Chris makes these breathless noises that are driving Sebastian crazy—little moans of _fuck_ and _oh_ and _Sebastian_. 

"Come on," Sebastian says after a perfect eternity--grabbing Chris' hand and standing up. It's uncomfortable in his jeans that may as well be painted on and he wants them off. More importantly--he wants Chris' off. "It'll be more comfortable on a bed," he explains. Chris smiles, lighting up the entire room with boyish happiness. When they get to Sebastian's room, Chris kisses him again before rucking up Sebastian's shirt and pulling it off.  

"I wanna see you," he murmurs. Sebastian feels a blush spreading across his cheeks. It isn't as if Chris hasn't seen him shirtless, but this is different. Chris isn't trying to hide the lust that spreads across his features, doesn't hold back when he grabs Sebastian's hips and pulls him close to suck a mark on his collarbone. 

Sebastian moans quietly, a breath of a noise against Chris' lips. It's a broken noise, a needy noise, but Sebastian doesn't care. He peels Chris' shirt off and deposits it somewhere on the floor, then drops to his knees. "Sebastian—" Chris whispers, looking down at him in . . . awe?

Sebastian concentrates on his task and, surprisingly, it only takes his shaking hands three tries to get the button of Chris' jeans open. Nervous fingers pull the pants down, Chris helpfully lifting his feet so Sebastian can pull them and his briefs all the way off. Sebastian just stares for a moment.

"Seb . . . you don't have to." Sebastian smiles up at him.  

"I want to," he says. Keeping eye contact, he licks the head of Chris' leaking cock. God does he taste good. Slowly, Sebastian takes Chris into his mouth. This . . . this he knows he's god at. Chris is hot and heavy on his tongue as he licks and sucks his way down to the base. Hollowing his cheeks, he sucks hard and pulls back to lap at the head and underside. Chris is moaning softly, a gentle hand placed on the back of Sebastian's hair to urge him on, but after a few minutes, Chris pulls him up to kiss him again and lay him down on the bed. 

 "You could make me come just from that," he says. After a few more kisses, Chris goes to work on Sebastian's pants. "I like you in these," he muses. "But I want them off." Sebastian has to help him get the jeans off—they're basically glued onto his body—and Chris tosses them onto the floor as if they offended him. "Holy shit," he murmurs. Sebastian isn't wearing underwear.  

"In my defense, I wasn't expecting company," Sebastian says, smirking at the look on Chris' face.  

"No explanation needed," Chris says, kissing him again and moving so that their cocks can rub together. Sebastian's back arches off the bed when they touch and his nails dig into Chris' hips. "God, you like that, baby?" Sebastian moans. He's never heard Chris talk like this and it's easily the hottest thing he's ever heard. "Tell me what you want," Chris murmurs, still rolling his hips roughly against Sebastian's. 

It takes him a few tries, but eventually, "fuck me," rolls off Sebastian's tongue. "Pula mea, Chris. _Să-mi fut_ —fuck me please." Chris kisses him. 

"If you're going to forget English when we're like this . . . fuck, Sebastian if that isn't the hottest thing I've ever heard." Sebastian rolls over to grab his lube out of the nightstand. He holds the bottle in his hand and studies Chris for a moment.  

"Are you sure?" he whispers, suddenly shy. He knows he's attractive, but he's never been looked at the way Chris is looking at him. Chris kisses his nose. 

"Shouldn't I be asking you that?" Sebastian sighs. "Hey, look at me." Sebastian lifts his eyes to look into deep blue. "Just because I haven't done this before doesn't mean I expect you to haven't. It's okay." Sebastian smiles. This man. He can't believe how lucky he is. Chris kisses him softly, tongue making its way between Sebastian's lips and lapping into his mouth. "Now," Chris says quietly. "Tell me how that works." Sebastian opens the lube and hands it to Chris. 

"Finger me. Exactly like you would a girl, but slower. I haven't done this in a while." _Since I fell in love with you._ "So just go slow. Until I get used to it, so it doesn't hurt." Chris' eyes widen and he slicks his fingers. Sebastian takes his hand and leads it down to his entrance. "Start with one," he says, letting go of Chris' hand. Chris circles his hole for a few seconds before pushing in slowly. Sebastian arches his back, pressing his head back into the mattress. It feels almost too good, the way Chris is working him open. Sebastian wouldn’t have guessed he’d never done this before. Chris slides in another finger and it burns, but only in the best way.

“You okay?” Chris asks. “We don’t have to do this. I don’t wanna hurt you.” Sebastian gasps and grabs Chris’ arm.

“If you stop right now, I’ll fuckin’ kill you, I swear to God.” Chris chuckles and leans down to kiss him, his other hand working Sebastian’s cock. “ _Rahat_ , God, Chris,” Sebastian pants when Chris adds a third finger. Everything just feels so fucking good that Sebastian has to swat Chris’ hand away from his cock before grabbing the lube and reaching down to slick Chris’ impressive length. He’s thick, and Sebastian knows it’s going to burn no matter how many fingers Chris gets in him before hand—might as well jump in. “Fuck me,” Sebastian pleads, too far gone to care about pride.

“God, Sebastian. Yes." Chris removes his fingers and wipes them on the sheets—Sebastian doesn’t even care—and lines himself up. But then he hesitates, looking at Sebastian with what can only be concern. “It’s going to hurt you,” he says. It’s not a question, but Sebastian answers anyway. 

“It won't be that bad,” Sebastian promises. “I can take it, Chris. I'm fine.” Chris still looks doubtful, but he presses forward so that the head breaches that tight ring of muscle. Sebastian arches his hips to take more of him, ignoring the burn, and Chris pushes until he’s fully seated within Sebastian’s body. The bigger man is panting by the time Sebastian opens his eyes.

“Seb? You with me?” Sebastian nods, unable to find words. “God, you look so fuckin’ pretty under me like this.” Chris wipes Sebastian’s hair off his sweaty forehead and leans down to press a kiss there. “You okay if I move, baby?”

 “ _Da_ . . . please, Chris.” Chris pulls back, thrusting shallowly until Sebastian gets used to the stretch. He’s so _full_. “Chris . . . more. God, give me more. _Vă rog_.” Chris picks up his pace, groaning softly and bringing Sebastian’s mouth back to his own. 

“Love it when you beg,” he murmurs and Sebastian doesn’t even care anymore, he just lets go and begs.

“ _Rahat_ , Chris. Please, more. I need it—faster, deeper. Give me everything, Chris. _Vă rog._ Oh, God, fuck me.” Chris’ lips move over Sebastian’s neck and settle at the base—sucking hard and biting slightly. Sebastian moans, loud and needy, and Chris does it again in the same spot.

“God, you like that,” he murmurs. “So good for me, baby. God, you're so fuckin’ beautiful, Sebastian.” Sebastian shivers at the praise and Chris notices. “So good,” he says again, bending Sebastian's leg and pushing his knee to his chest—it’s so deep this way. “Look at you,” Chris murmurs, running his free hand down Sebastian’s side. “God, you want this so much, don’t you?” Sebastian presents his throat for Chris to suck on the mark on his neck. Chris obliges, biting at the mark at the same time he hits Sebastian’s prostate. “Oh, god, I’m gonna come,” he mutters, almost to himself, still nailing Sebastian’s prostate. “I want you to come, baby.” Chris’ hand sneaks down to jerk Sebastian off as they fuck and Sebastian has lost control of what comes out of his mouth. It’s a mix of _rahat_ and _give it to me_ and _God, Chris._ “Come for me, Sebastian.” Sebastian almost screams as he comes—his orgasm having snuck up on him. Chris keeps fucking into him, fast and hard and wonderful and Sebastian is sobbing by the time Chris comes, hot and wet inside of him with a shout of Sebastian’s name. Sebastian comes again, seeing stars, mouth open in a wordless shout, as Chris thrusts through his own release.

Sebastian hears himself make a small noise when Chris collapses on top of him, rolling to the side so that only half of his weight is on Sebastian, but other than that, he’s drifting in the bliss of the afterglow—trying to catch his breath. He hadn't even known two orgasms in a row like that was possible. He's content like this. Well, he _was_ until Chris bolts upright beside him.

“Oh, God, Seb—fuck, you're fuckin’ crying. Okay—shit. How bad—I mean . . . did I hurt you? Tell me, please.” Chris’ hands hover around his face like he wants to touch him. Sebastian looks into his eyes, takes his hand, and pressed it to his own cheek. Chris’ eyes widen a bit, but his thumb brushes under Sebastian’s eye, wiping the tears away. “Tell me, baby,” Chris pleads.

“You didn’t hurt me, Chris,” Sebastian says. “I’m wonderful. You're wonderful. God, I love you.” And then horror rushes over him when he realises what he said. He clasps a hand over his mouth—like that will take the words back. He stares at Chris, cursing himself for being too honest, for being stupid, for being careless. It’s too soon, too soon for that. For Chris to have any real, solid feelings for him. Right? Chris is just staring at him, lips parted. Sebastian wants to hide. He wants to throw the covers over himself or find a nice dark corner or a cave somewhere to curl up in.

“You . . .” Chris trails off, trying to move toward him, but Sebastian shrinks back, hand still over his mouth. He squeezes his eyes closed, like he can will away the situation he’s just thrown Chris into. “Sebastian, look at me,” Chris says quietly. There’s authority in his voice, something that makes it impossible for Sebastian not to do what he’s told. “Sebastian . . . _God_ , I love you too.” Sebastian just gapes at him. “God, I love you so fuckin’ much. I’m sorry I never said it before. I love you, I love you.” And then Chris dives in for a searing kiss—a kiss that flips Sebastian’s world upside down and shoves it inside out. The hand on his waist and the hand in his hair keep him together until the love pouring out of Chris can put all of Sebastian’s pieces back together and glue them carefully in all the right places. His heart—something he though would never be engaged again—beats happily in his chest, full of love for this man.

“I love you,” he whispers, pressing his forehead against Chris’. “I do. I have for a long time.” Chris kisses his nose.

“We’re idiots.” Sebastian laughs and he feels Chris’ chest rumble with his own laughter. 

“I know. I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry.” Chris hugs him close, sharing his warmth.

“Don’t be. We’re together now, and I guess that’s what matters.” Sebastian kisses his shoulder.

“And you say you're not good with words.” Chris peers down at him. 

“What’s that?”

“You always know just what to say,” Sebastian murmurs, nuzzling into Chris’ chest. “To make me feel valued.” Chris kisses his temple.

“Don’t ever let anyone tell you you're invaluable. It’s a lie. A horrible fuckin’ lie. Please don’t tell me you think that of yourself. Please.” Sebastian thinks about that. He doesn’t, not really, not anymore, but he can't help it sometimes when he’s been alone too long or he’s had a hard day and in the darkest hours of the night his thoughts get twisted and he had nightmares. 

“Not exactly. I wouldn’t say invaluable. Maybe . . . broken? English is an awful language. Doesn’t have the right words.” Chris almost laughs at that.

“We’re all broken in one way or another. Hopefully, with time, things will fix themselves. It won't always be easy,” he warns. “I do have awful anxiety and I've lost someone I cared about and that makes me panic when someone gets hurt or even if you get a bruise on set . . .” Sebastian doesn’t stop him. They need to get this out now.

“I can't promise not to get hurt, but I can promise that I’ll tell you, and that I’ll let you take care of me.” Chris smiles.

“Fair enough.” They kiss for a few minutes before settling down. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” After a few moments, Chris is snoring softly, nose nuzzled into Sebastian’s hair. A small smile plays at the corner of Sebastian’s lips as he dozes off—this is where he belongs. This is where he feels safe.

This is home.

-

When Chris wakes up, he expects Sebastian to be next to him, but he isn’t. The place beside him is cold, empty—has been for a while, it seems. Chris sits up, starting to panic. Had Sebastian changed his mind? Had he left? Chris’ breathing quickens, fear creeping in.

But then Sebastian walks in looking perfect in only black briefs with tousled hair and Chris’ deep purple-red mark on his neck. There’s a stupidly beautiful grin on his face—well, until he sees Chris’ face. 

“Hey,” he says, walking over to Chris with all the grace of a dancer. “Hey, Chris, I'm right here.” He crawls under to covers next to Chris and snuggles up. Chris relaxes and drapes an arm around the smaller man, warming all that golden skin. “Take deep breaths, I'm right here.” Chris presses his lips to Sebastian’s temple and listens to his breathing, trying to match it. “I made breakfast,” Sebastian whispers after a while. Chris looks down at him, warm and happy and _glowing_ in the morning sunlight.

“I’m sorry, I just . . .”

“You thought it wasn’t real,” Sebastian offers. Chris nods. Warm lips press against his own, tongue seeking entrance. Chris parts his lips and Sebastian licks into his mouth, moving so that he’s practically on top of Chris, and then suddenly pulls away. “Up!” he says, pecking Chris on the lips again. “I made pancakes.” Chris is hard and wanting and Sebastian knows that. Chris flips them over and pins Sebastian to the abused sheets.

“Not so fast,” he murmurs, kissing Sebastian soundly. 

“Chris,” Sebastian whines.

“Breakfast can wait,” Chris says, kissing his way down to Sebastian’s briefs. Designer. Of course. “I want these off.” His fingers dip under the waistband and pull them slowly down, sitting back on his knees to pull them all the way off. “Let’s see if you're still slick from last night.”

It’s nothing like the night before—it’s just as wonderful, but they take it slow, savouring each other in the chilly morning. Sebastian’s moans are quieter, but he still begs. Begs for _deeper_ and _oh, god, angle up, right there_ , and _more_. Chris is helpless to deny him, and Sebastian knows it, the little shit. Chris rolls them over so that Sebastian’s on top, fucking himself slow and deep on Chris’ cock, fingernails digging into Chris’ chest leaving red crescent-shaped marks. When Chris gets close, he grabs Sebastian by the back of the head and pulls him down to suck on the bruise on his neck.

“Come,” Chris commands, biting down on the hickey-turned-bruise. “Fuck,” Chris whispers, spilling into Sebastian’s wet heat. Sebastian’s come is sticky on Chris’ chest, so once they’ve caught their breath, Chris pulls them into the bathroom for a shower. They trade lazy kisses and wash each other’s hair before getting out and devouring the pancakes Sebastian had smartly covered in foil and stuck in the microwave. It’s delicious—Chris wouldn’t expect anything less.

They get back in bed after—it had been a long night—and he cuddles Sebastian under the covers. They watch movies on the TV in Sebastian’s room, trading lazy kisses. He tries not to think of how they’re going to handle the media. Chris sure as hell isn’t going to hide their relationship, but he doesn’t want their personal business broadcasted everywhere, either. But right now, with Sebastian cuddled up to him and humming contentedly like a cat, Chris can forget about it.

 “I love you,” he tells Sebastian.

“Mmh,” Sebastian mutters, already falling asleep. “ _Te iubesc_.” Even though it’s in Romanian, he knows what that means. Curled up against Sebastian, warm and content, Chris can't think of anywhere he’d rather be.


End file.
